Tag Archives: stress

inspiration

18 Jun

*Image found on Pinterest. But it was originally found HERE.

lists are your friend

31 Mar

TIP #5- LISTS, LISTS, LISTS

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard women say,

“I don’t need to write down lists because I keep everything inside my head.”

I’m sorry… You keep EVERYTHING inside YOUR HEAD? My head would definitely explode. No wonder women and mammas all around are stressing out and on the verge of nervous breakdowns! I mean, I know that this isn’t the sole reason for the stress, but seriously?? How can you just keep everything that you need to do and get done for the day, week, and month inside your head? I mean, if it really is truly working for you, then go for it I guess? But I’ve come to learn very, very quickly that writing stuff down is not only an important key in maintaining your organization, but it’s absolutely vital to my sanity.

Lists are your friend.

I have so many lists going at any given time. I have a list for groceries, toiletries, daily to-do’s, areas that need to get cleaned, clients to call back and so on. It’s helpful because I know I can write it down and then I don’t have to worry! I don’t have to worry that I MIGHT TOTALLY DROP ALL THE BALLS I HAVE IN THE AIR.

<insert panic mode HERE>

No. There’s no panic mode. If I start to feel uneasy about the tasks I need to do, instead of WRACKING my BRAIN, I just reference the list. It really is that simple you guys. I know this isn’t rocket science or brand new information by any stretch of the imagination. But it really helps me to stay focused on the day to day, and I don’t need to be a stresscase wondering if I’m forgetting anything!

Get an organizer. I love my organizer. I got mine from Target and it’s a Mead Planner. It’s simple, inexpensive, no bells and whistles and has room for any and everything that I can put in it. And boy do I! It can LOOK a little chaotic at times, but it’s my chaos. And everything’s written down so I understand it. So it actually is quite organized and it really helps me to see the week at a glance. If ever I’m feeling like I’m forgetting something, I just reference my organizer.

It’s really amazing what just writing stuff down will do for your day. When something you need to do pops into your head, add it to a list and write it down! I try to prioritize my lists by important to not as important. That way I know right when I get up what it is that needs to get done that day.

It’s so easy you guys. Yes, it takes a little bit of discipline. But it will really turn you from a stresscase to someone who has it together and who knows what comes next during the day. It’s all about having a plan, and sticking to it. That way you can be that working mamma and get outside with your babies in this glorious weather that is Arizona. Well, right now. Later we’ll be living in the pool. But that’s completely off the topic.

be the first one

10 Jul

We have this book that I keep out on purpose. It’s called Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff… And It’s All Small Stuff by Richard Carlson. I’m not sure who gave it to us or how it came to be ours. Actually, just as I typed that I thought I’d look into the book to double check and make sure there wasn’t a note inside from whoever gave it to us. And there was. Ha! It was given to me while I worked at Westcor from a customer who thought I needed this book.

I can tend to be a stress case at times. In case you didn’t know.

Anyways. I picked it up today for no reason at all. Sometimes I just like to read one or two of the small chapters for encouragement or just to think on. Sometimes they hit me with where I’m at in life and other times they don’t hit me at all. Today I opened right up to chapter 15 titled Be The First One To Act Loving Or Reach Out. And it was a great, great reminder. It reminded me that I can tend to have a lot of pride when it comes to relationships and people in my life sometimes. That I can tend to dwell on the wrong that was done to me instead of focusing on how important the relationship with whoever I’m struggling with is or once was. I forget that Jesus wouldn’t stubbornly wait for the other to right the wrong first. He would have reached out to make it right first. FIRST. It’s such a hard thing for me to remember and to learn. Especially when you are so convinced that you are right and that your feelings were more valid that theirs.

It’s hard.

This is what the short excerpt says. It really spoke to me today:

” So many of us hold onto little resentments that may have stemmed from an argument, a misunderstanding, the way we were raised, or some other painful event. Stubbornly, we wait for someone else to reach out to us- believing this is the only way we can forgive or rekindle a friendship or family relationship.

An acquaintance of mine, who’s health isn’t very good, recently told me that she hasn’t spoken to her son in almost three years. “Why not?” I asked. She said that she and her son had had a disagreement about his wife and that she wouldn’t speak to him again unless he called first. When I suggested that she be the one to reach out, she resisted initially and said, ” I can’t do that. He’s the one who should apologize.” She was literally willing to die before reaching out to her only son. After a little gentle encouragement, however, she did decide to be the first one to reach out. To her amazement, her son was grateful for her willingness to call and offered an apology of his own. As is usually the case when someone takes the chance and reaches out, everyone wins.

Whenever we hold onto our anger, we turn “small stuff” into really “big stuff” in our minds. We start to believe that our positions are more important than our happiness. They are not. If you want to be a more peaceful person you must understand that being right is almost never more important than allowing yourself to be happy. The way to be happy is to let go, and reach out. Let other people be right. This doesn’t mean that you’re wrong. Everything will be fine. You’ll experience the peace of letting go, as well as the joy of letting others be right. You’ll also notice that, as you reach out and let others be “right”, they will become less defensive and more loving toward you. They might even reach back. But, if for some reason they don’t, that’s ok too. You’ll have the inner satisfaction of knowing that you have done your part to create a more loving world, and certainly you’ll be more peaceful with yourself.”

It’s super hard I know. It’s something I’m working on constantly and watching others around me work on too. It’s not easy, but it’s so necessary sometimes.

What do you need to let go of? Who do you need to reach out to? Life’s too short not to at least try.

anxiety update

21 Apr

If you’ve known me for any length of time, you probably know that I’ve struggled with anxiety- in some form or another- for most of my life. I remember it starting when I was little girl; mostly I worried about things that a seven year old shouldn’t need to worry about. So it’s been a life long battle over my mind. And through my life, in and out of counseling for it, I’ve come to realize that this is an extremely common thing to deal with. I know countless people who struggle with anxiety, each story being slightly different, but ultimately it’s the same thing. Anxiety.

I’ve been pretty good about it in the past couple years. Prior to Cruz being born, I couldn’t even be in a crowded room without feeling like the walls were caving in on me. I would wake up in cold sweats because of nightmares all night long. And my heart would race all day. Any time I was in a meeting with work, I needed to sit closest to the door. If anyone sat to where they blocked the door, I had to leave.

Then I had Cruz and it’s gotten better, sort of. I think having a baby brought on new anxieties, but also making it somewhat impossible to stop and think about the walls that once caved in. But I found myself being anxious about new things that all mom’s face:

Is the baby breathing? Did someone steal him out of his crib? Is he choking? Is he cold? Is he hungry? Is he wet?

Exhausting.

But now that I’m out of the baby phase with Cruz, I can see the anxiety that I once faced, and once thought was long gone, seeping back into my life. Kinda freaky, to be honest. And I’m not sure what to do about it.

I try to take time for me. I try to rest, pray, gather my thoughts, sleep. I have super negative thoughts during the day- mostly about tragedies that ‘could’ occur in my life and ones that really frighten me. I have nightmares and crazy dreams all night long. I wake up at 4:00 on the dot every morning, unable to fall back to sleep. So the sleep that I do get is full of  insane thoughts (so I’m not resting) and then I toss and turn from 4:00 am until I wake up, again with my mid racing (so I’m not resting).

So I’m exhausted all day (mind still racing), super busy with work (mind still racing), try to move to Scottsdale (mind still racing), rent out our house (mind still racing), being pregnant (mind still racing), and just trying to stay afloat! It’s been an exhausting week, and the lack of sleep has made me super emotional.

*Sigh*

It’s so hard to prioritize everything in a day. When I’m focusing on one thing, I feel guilty for neglecting others. There’s so much transition still happening, that I’m just so ready to be settled in our lives, get organized and breathe.

Anxiety is an awful tool that the devil uses in the lives of so many. Taking your thoughts captive is so SO hard. The battle over my mind and thoughts has been a life long struggle. One that definitely gets worse when I’m busy. So I’m not sure why I’m posting this. I’ve just realized that I am on the brink of an emotional breakdown lately, and writing about it tends to help me. Knowing that YOU, reader, might be struggling with this too, helps me a lot. I’m not alone in the struggle with anxiety. I know it’s going to be ok. Satan doesn’t win in the end, Christ does! So I know taking my thoughts captive is essential. It’s just so much easier said than done.

Maybe I’m just rambling. Whatever. I feel better.

Is anyone else even relating to this?

forwards

31 Mar

Usually I don’t even open forwards. I don’t like them typically, and when they head my way I just delete them. Every now and then I will forward one on. So if you get a forward from me, read it because it HAS to be good for me to forward it. Ha!

But my mom sent this to me the other day and I’m not gonna lie, when I saw it come through I thought, ‘Seriously?’… But then I remembered that my own mom sent it to me and she NEVER sends me forwards so it has to be good. I read through this and it struck a cord with me- mostly because I’m working on an upcoming post about my thoughts on the new series Food Revolution with Jamie Oliver; something I’ve been really thinking over, struggling with and sorting through in my heart. That might sounds pretty heavy, but it’s not. Basically, I’m overwhelmed at times, like every single parent on the planet, with how to raise my son to be healthy, eat healthy, live healthy and be a productive, morally conscious, God-fearing man who loves Jesus more than life itself.

Whoa. That’s definitely overwhelming.

Eating right is just the beginning and I’m only starting to scratch the surface as to what it means to raise this little boy (and Baby #2) right- with all of Jay’s help of course.

Anyways. My mom sent me this forward and I want to share it with you. It made me remember that as a mom I have a thousand and one decisions to make for Cruz everyday. And it reminded me that a lot of the things that us moms worry about don’t (or shouldn’t) even necessarily matter. I’m trying hard to focus on things that do: His health, his personality, his spirit, and hoping and praying that one day he’ll love Jesus like his mommy and daddy do.

It might not provoke as much thought for you as it did for me. And you might have seen this before. But it got my wheels spinning, for sure. Keep in mind, I was born in the 80’s. But I was raised similarly to one of these kids. Where the small stuff didn’t matter and the big stuff did. Obviously I don’t agree with all of this. But it definitely did make me think.

And it made me remember that there really was a simpler time. And we all were OK.

To All The Kids Who Survived The 1930’s, 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and 70’s:

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, ate tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes. Then, after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, locks on doors or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes we had baseball caps, not helmets, on our heads.

As infants and children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, no booster seats, no seat belts, no air bags, bald tires and sometimes no brakes. Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from a garden hose and not from a bottle. We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and no one actually died from this. We ate cupcakes made with lard, white bread, real butter and bacon. We drank FLAV-OR-AID made with real white sugar. And we weren’t overweight. WHY?

Because we were always outside playing… that’s why!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day as long as we were back when the street lights came on. No one was able to reach us all day and we were OKAY.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride them down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo’s, and X-boxes. There were no video games, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD’s, no surround sound or CD’s, no cell-phones, no personal computers, no Internet and no chat rooms.

WE HAD FRIENDS. And we went outside and found them.

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents. We would get spankings with wooden spoons, switches, ping pong paddles or just a bare hand and no one would call child services to report abuse.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friends house and knocked on the door, rang the bell or just walked in and talked to them.

Little League had try-outs and not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with the disappointment. Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever. The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. What can todays kids do besides push buttons? We had freedom, failure, success, and responsibility and we learned how to deal with it all. If YOU are one of them, congratulations!

You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives “for our own good”.


third times a charm

30 Nov

I’m starting over with P90X. Yep, you heard me. Starting over. The last time I posted about P90X, I was working out everyday and determined to finish the program. Then I found I was pregnant, so I stopped. Then I had a miscarriage which still didn’t give me any motivation to start back up again.

I’ve wanted to start exercising again, and everytime Monday rolls around I think “Ok, this is it! I’m gonna start as soon as it’s Monday!” But Monday would come and go and I’ve just had no motivation for working out again. I’ve spent the last two months trying to process everything that’s happened. Sad at loosing our baby. Mad about Jay’s layoff, but relieved and happy about it too. I’m thankful that things have happened the way that they have, don’t get me wrong.

But I am human. And there is a huge element of sadness, anger and frustration that I’ve been trying to sort out. I’ve been angry at people and friends, if I’m being honest here. There’s people that were in my life for years who’ve vanished- people who I thought we’d be friends with for the rest of our lives. I don’t know what to do with that. I’ve been processing different kinds of anxiety all while being SO busy- there hasn’t been enough time to process all of it.

And I feel sad about it.

I’ll admit I’ve been stress eating. Doesn’t it just make you feel better? It makes me feel better sometimes. And if you know me at all, you know that is not like me in the least. I am usually really careful about what I eat. I’ve done Weight Watchers for years and have been very successful at it- loosing over 40 pounds in a 16 week period. And after I had Cruz I lost all my baby weight pretty quickly, was back into my clothes, no big deal. But these past couple months I just haven’t cared really. Which is not like me at all.

So, I finally got my motivation back up. I feel like I’ve been sulking and angry for too long over stuff. I’ve had my share of depressed eating. And now, it’s time to get back into shape. I’m not going to post when I started up again or my goal end date (I have already started the program). I’m not going to post pictures or post my weekly progress. This time, I’m doing this for me so I can get back into shape for me. I’m trying not to be sad over having that miscarriage- even though I know a part of me always will be. I’m trying not to be mad at people in my life and just hand it over to God for Him to take care of. I’m ready to eat better and make smarter choices. And I’m really determined to not fall off the wagon again.

And I have to do it. I have to do it to stay healthy for me, Cruz, Jason. All kinds of reasons. But mostly because when I’ve put weight on, it usually means that I’m stressed, anxious, sad or unhappy about something. And I just can’t go through life this way. There’s been days where it’s just been hard to get out of bed. I’m exhausted on top of it. To sum it up, I just haven’t really been taking care of myself or putting me first. And that’s a dangerous road to start on, because I always told myself that as I mom I would never do that. But it’s so, so, easy to put everyone else in your home first and to let yourself go.

I’m working very hard at not letting this happen to me. I’ve sulked long enough. I’ve started forcing myself out of bed about an hour and a half before Cruz wakes up- just so I can be by myself, wake up, blog, read my bible. That way I can workout when he’s napping and not feel guilty that other things aren’t getting done. I’m trying to eat better and make better choices there. I’m doing P90X everyday, and so super sore, it’s not even funny. I’m trying to go to bed early. I’m trying not to stress that my house isn’t perfectly dusted and spick n span. That’s a hard one for me, because I love my house clean. But I’m trying to get a handle on what’s important for ME.

Because if I’m taking care of myself, then taking care of Jason and Cruz and other eventual children to come will fall into place. It’s hard to do this everyday.

So there’s the update in case you, dear reader, were wondering what ever happened to my P90X ventures. Well, there haven’t been any P90X ventures for a while. But now I’m getting back on track.

And now here’s a picture of Audio, my dog. Because I don’t really think you want to see pictures of me doing P90X. Yikes.

childlike faith

7 Oct

Cruz at 11 Months

This little face is what keeps me going. I mean, honestly. During a time when I have moments where I want to just crawl back into bed and sleep the day away, I’m reminded (by this sweet face) that I am apart of something bigger here. Something that has nothing to do with me.  I have a little guy who’s relying on me and on us.

And this little face makes us smile all day long.

He has no concept of the stress we are going through. He has no idea the things we are discussing, deciding, praying over. He has no care in the world- unless he’s hungry, tired or poopy. He just trusts us- no matter where we take him- to meet all of his needs. Everyday.

This is the childlike faith that I am learning all over again.