Tag Archives: Proverbs 31

words of life

11 Jun

Keeping up with this series has been sorta difficult for me. Well, blogging in general has been which is weird. I am a writer. It comes easy to me and I usually always have something to say. But in this past six months, it’s just been a constant battle inside my heart and my mind. And to be honest, its been sorta paralyzing at times. God has constantly reminded me how much I truly need Him in this life and how I can’t do this by myself- even when things are actually going ok! So because of that, I’ve had to step back from some things and try to take some time to rest my soul and my mind when I can.

Through studying this chapter, God somehow always prompts me to write my next post in this series in the exact right timing that I need to hear from Him about what I’m struggling with. So I have found that doing this series has made me way more vulnerable than I was planning because I find myself sharing with you things that I’m really struggling with, as im struggling with it. It’s been a much more organic process than I was anticipating, but slower to evolve at the same time. Anyways.

The next verse in my study of Proverbs 31 is:

“She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.” Proverbs 31:26

Words. This next verse is about our words. *Sigh*

Why is controlling our tongues one of the hardest lessons to learn? Why have I been struggling with this so much? The truth is, I haven’t been struggling with it in a gossip sort of way, although there HAVE been times in my life that I’ve struggled with that. But right now, I’ve been struggling with my words in the ways that I talk to my family. Mostly my kids. Lately, I have been tired, not reading my Bible enough and just running on empty. I’ve allowed myself to become exhausted and to take on too much at times. And because of that, I have so willingly put my kids last- especially this  past week- and I have had an incredibly short temper with them. My short temper this week, has not come from God. The Bible says MANY times that the Lord is slow to anger, like in Psalms 103 stating, ‘The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.’

Not only is He slow to anger, but He’s compassionate, gracious and abounding in love. My words and my heart haven’t reflected that to my kids this week. I haven’t loved them the ways that God loves us as much as I should have. I haven’t been compassionate, gracious or abounding in love. Don’t get me wrong, I DO love my kids. And I haven’t been a complete monster to them. HA. But, I’ve just had a shorter fuse that I usually do. And I was convicted this week that it’s been out of my own disobedience. To be honest, I had a defining moment when Cruz walked up to me and told me he was “really, really mad” after I had yelled at him for disobeying. My heart broke. The way I was choosing to discipline them this past week was actually making it worse. And it was stirring up my little boys anxious heart and confusing him about why mommy was so angry. And it was causing HIM to be angry and mad too. How do I know? That sweet boy actually TOLD me that he was very, very mad when I yell.

Words. Words are so powerful. They have the ability to ruin entire households. Wars have been started over mere gossip. Families torn apart over harsh words, misunderstandings or even just the wrong tones. Proverbs 15:4 says, “The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.” Proverbs 18:21 says, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”

Our words can crush spirits and has the power of life and death. Holy moly. When I read this, I was vividly reminded about the damage I can do with my words. My big, loud, carless words spoken over my little boys can crush their little spirits. It can crush a girlfriends spirt. My husbands spirit. Or your OWN spirt. Our words are so incredibly powerful. Powerful enough that Satan can make us THINK that our words aren’t doing any damage, when in fact, they are sparking a fire that could blaze and entire forest (James 3:4-6).

The Proverbs 31 woman is very, very different. I actually don’t think she had a lot to say, at times. The Bible says she speaks with WISDOM. And with wisdom comes discernment. She is thinking about her words, choosing wisely, and not starting gossip. She is deciding to use her words for faithful instruction to her children, her family and her friends. Words that they can count on. Words that will be uplifting, even in a crucial disciplining moment. Words that won’t do damage or crush little spirits. Her words give life. And I have a feeling that she wasn’t known as the town gossip. She wasn’t known as the bully or as someone who would put you in your place if you needed it. She was wise in her speaking, choosing what words to say. She gave out faithful instruction and all those who were witness to it gained something positive from her words.

Don’t you want your words to reflect that about you as well? Shouldn’t our mouths be an exact reflection of our hearts? Shouldn’t our little kids come to know and subconsciously understand that mommy isn’t going to fly off the handle? Wise words and faithful instruction SHOULD fill our homes. When I think about what that looks like, it isn’t yelling and screaming. It isn’t chaos. It isn’t gossip. It’s methodical, well planned, self-controlled words that are only spoken to give life.

Oh how I’ve failed at times recently here to give life with my words. What  a convicting passage for me. I am going to be working on allowing my mouth to be the gate keeper for every word that comes out. Because once your words are out, they can’t be taken back. And THAT, is when it can cause real death and crush spirits. We think that words aren’t going to be painful. Or that our toddlers won’t remember or hear what we mutter under our breaths when we are angry. But in fact, they are. And once spoken, if not thought and planned carefully, can kill a precious spirit that was designed by God Himself. I’ve received a jolt this week by this verse. And you better believe that I’ll be working on this area of my life from here on out. God is very clear to warn us of the danger here, with our words. And I don’t want my kids, family or friends to be on the receiving end of something that is so obviously a heart issue on my part.

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husbands

16 Mar

TODAY. I’m talking about our husbands. And how important our roles is as wives.

The next verse in my study of Proverbs is:

‘Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.’ Proverbs 31:23

It’s pretty crazy to me that this verse would reside right smack dab in the middle of describing this amazing woman of noble character. It hit me hard how incredibly important our roles as GOOD wives and mothers really is. The success of our husbands is dependent on it. I know that each man is responsible for his own choices and mistakes, so I am not saying that as wives we are responsible for every decision, good or bad, that our husbands make. But I AM saying that we, as their wives, have an incredible amount of influence. We set the tone in the entire home; the thermostat, if you will. We have the power to support, encourage, and lift up. Or we can easily build strife, tear down and discourage within our homes.

Whoa. There’s a lot of damage that could be done if we, the wives, aren’t careful.

The bible also says,“A wife of noble character is her husbands crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.” Proverbs 12:4

DECAY? In his bones? That’s the same as death. Being a disgraceful wife is the same as decay in his bones. BUT a crown to her husband, is something he is proud of. He cherishes it and wears it proudly. He knows his wife supports him and can leave to head to his work with confidence. He is confident in her and in all that she does for their family and he loves her. He’s proud of her.

He’s respected in the city gates, which is where all the  business and legal matters were once settled. It was considered a high honor for a man to sit in the gates. He likely would have had to achieved a certain amount of business success and he was very wise. It wasn’t a place for fools. This man was highly respected. He was a very hard worker. He endured much to obtain the status that he now holds. And it’s likely that he didn’t do it alone. The support of his faithful and fearless wife was probably the backbone to all of his success. Her persistent prayers for him, her encouraging words to him, her uplifting spirits and positive attitudes probably helped spur him on to all that God was calling him to. This man has the full support of his wife. And she believes in him to be an amazing man of God. She didn’t nag him. She never stole his courage. She wasn’t an enemy in his own home. This woman realized how great her husband was. He wasn’t average. He was a great man. And she knew that this man needed a helper in his life. She didn’t work to tear him down, or to be resentful towards him, or harboring anger. She faithfully loved him through supporting his work and taking care of their family.

Everything  we do as wives makes a huge impact on our husbands. And I think its so important to remember, that while we are busy running our households, we are also representing him. The bible is full of verses that talk about how dangerous it is to be a wife of contention (Proverbs 25:24, Proverbs 21:19, Proverbs 27:15). This is a wife that doesn’t create harmony, one who argues, one who nags. Nothing good comes from bitterness in our hearts towards our husbands and anger that makes your home living environment unbearable. WE are the thermostats in our home. And as hard as it may be to love and support your husband at times, its important. Your husband IS amazing. You married him, right?! Why not help encourage him to BE amazing in whatever it is that he is doing? Pray for him. Pray for protection around him. Pray that he would be used to glorify God in the ways that HE sees fit. Not in the ways YOU see fit. Pray for God’s will in his life and that he WOULD lead your home. Be your husbands biggest cheerleader. Be his biggest prayer warrior. It’s SO important to remember that you are a team, together in this life. And while you might not be the one going outside of the home to make a living, he IS. And it can be a dark and scary place for a man to stand alone.

I’m aware that marriage is hard. I married a very easy going, workable guy who has been a team with me in everything so far in this life together. But STILL, marriage is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. It’s so important to take care of one another. Take care of your home and husband as though it’s your ministry. It’s a window into your heart and the success of your husband depends on it. I have to remind myself every day that my home is my ministry. Not that I don’t love it, but because it’s HARD. This job as a wife and mother is hard, sacrificial work. But making the choice every day to love, respect and support your husband isn’t an option, I think. The bible is pretty clear that we are to be our husbands crown. A valuable partner in his life, taking care of him, our family and working hard too. Jesus never promises that ANY of this is going to be easy. But I can see the rewards of this woman’s hard work just LEAPING off the page at me. Do you think she felt rewarded every day?

No. I guarantee she didn’t.

But she was faithful. Faithful to her husband, supportive in his work, and loved him. Their whole family was respected by the entire city. Something that was achieved by the TWO of them working together. a faithful team until the end. And an amazing example for us all.

preparation

24 Jan

I’m a week late on this post. We’ve had sick kiddies in our household, and as you know, that can tend to put other things on hold when that happens. Its been a blessing in disguise because I honestly needed a little more time to think on this verse. I didn’t understand the meaning in it, or what I was supposed to learn. Maybe it jumps off the page to you. But it took a little longer for me. It was always one of those verses that I just sort of breezed past. But after praying on it and doing a little more research, I realized that I was wrong about this verse and it’s importance. I just didn’t really understand it at first.

The next verse is:

‘She is not afraid of the snow for her household, for all her household are clothed with scarlet.’ Proverbs 31:21

I believe this verse is saying a couple different things. First, she’s not afraid of the winter that is coming. Why? I believe it’s because she’s PREPARED. She is always looking ahead to the next season and preparing her home and family accordingly. She is ready for the snow and the harsh winter that might possibly be coming. She doesn’t need to be afraid because she is prepared for what the next season may bring.

How many times do we enter the next season in our lives scattered, nervous and anxious? I know I struggle with this sometimes. I just roll into the next season without really taking the time to truly PREPARE for it. This woman is not afraid. She looks ahead and gets her household ready for the next season. She’s likely getting winter clothing ready, sewing enough to keep them warm. Her children are growing and she sees the needs that they will have ahead of time. She isn’t overwhelmed by it. She isn’t dreading all the work to be done. She isn’t afraid of the storms that will likely come. She anticipates the cold, blistering winter that lies ahead and she prepares for it. The storms that come don’t take her by surprise because she is ready. And she doesn’t live in fear.

I struggle with fear. Sometimes, I fear the worst. Why do I do that? This woman doesn’t do that. She prepares for it, is ready for it, and probably doesn’t live in a spirit of dread while doing it.

But then it says that all of her household is clothed in scarlet, which I think speaks a lot about what kind of a wife and mother she is. I think that it means that she CARES. Not only does she care enough to prepare for the winter for her whole family with all the hard work that goes with that, but they are clothed in scarlet. which is a beautiful color. I could be wrong here, but I take this to mean that she cared enough to make sure that they all looked good. Not in a materialistic kind of way. Not in the showy kind of way. Not in the fake kind of way where she just wanted to keep up appearances. But because she CARED about them. She wanted them to look their best, with whatever means they had. She wanted her husband and children to feel proud in what they were wearing and to be blessed by it. She cared that they were put together before they left the house in the morning, and she worked hard to sew, do laundry and to prepare their things for them.

These two verses speak VOLUMES to the harmony that she created within her home. Her family doesn’t need to worry about the clothing they are going to wear. She is already on top of it before the winters come. They don’t even question whether or not they are going to have clothing on their backs. They are confident in her and know that each article of clothing that she carefully sews for them will be out of love, care and careful planning.

I’m not saying that we all need to become amazing seamstresses before this verse can apply. I am the FURTHEST from good seamstress. And I secretly envy those of you who can sew and create beautiful things in that way. But I do think we can all learn something from this verse, whether or not you can sew and create clothing. I think there is a lot to be said about creating harmony in our homes. There’s a peace that comes with preparation, hard work, and planning. And I think it’s really important to see the next season looming on the horizon and to gently start preparing for it. Not out of worry, but to get things in order so we can transition our families into whatever the next season of life may be for us. Clothing our families with confidence is more than about what they are actually wearing. But taking the time to care for what they look like, inside and out, and to cover them with beauty in our words, actions, hard work, and even in material things at times.

Being prepared and caring for our families in the day to day tasks, such as brushing their hair, is something that will go such a long way. As women and mothers, caring for our family is something that seems like an obvious topic of conversation. Of course we’re taking care of our families. BUT, I know all too well that the day to day tasks can become somewhat mundane. It was an awesome reminder to me to remember that all of the preparation I do every day, week, month, actually can make a huge difference in the morale of my family. Am I preparing our lives in such a way as to instill confidence? Or am I afraid? Am I not caring to brush their hair and teeth, because they’re “too little” to care? Am I remembering that what we look like (inside and out) is a direct reflection on the work I do inside my home when no one else is looking?

I am reminded that I have no need to be afraid of the winters ahead. But to work hard, prepare for the snow, and to clothe my family with the best that I have to offer. Confidence will breed from my attitude and hard work as a mother and a wife. They will be confident in me, and they will always know that I have their best interest at heart.

needy & poor

9 Jan

I’m jumping right on in today on the next verse in my Proverbs 31 series. The next verse is:

‘She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.’ Proverbs 31:20

It probably seems like an obvious verse. Obviously, we all need to be helping the poor and the needy. Don’t most people have a heart for those who are less fortunate? For those who don’t have anything? For the needy?

I know I do.

The unique thing that I love about this woman, is that she is probably doing this right in her own neighborhood. She is probably reaching out right in her own community. And while I DO think she is actually helping people that don’t have much materialistically, I think more-so she is aware of those who also are needy emotionally. Mentally. Those who are wounded and broken. People who are in despair. Widows who are now raising children with no father because they were killed in Iraq. Encouraging the stay-at-home mom down the street who is so lonely that she just wants to die. Reaching out to the teenager who bags her groceries every week.

She is open to how the Spirit is to use her, all through her daily life.

Because the truth is, we all come into contact with people EVERY DAY who are struggling, contemplating suicide, doing drugs and begging on the inside for someone to notice how lonely they really are. They might actually have all the materialistic things in the world and still be needy. And I honestly have to read this verse and ask myself sincerely, ‘AM I truly open?’.  Am I opening my arms to the poor and EXTENDING them to people who are in need?

Whether it be giving a homeless man ten bucks to buy some food or just listening to a friend who has been deeply wounded in their past. Whatever the need may be, I read this verse and have to ask myself, ‘AM I truly open?’.

I always say that this woman amazes me. But she really does. This verse doesn’t say that she doesn’t have time to recognize those in need. It doesn’t say that she sees them and just prays for them because she’s too busy. It says that she just DOES it. She opens her arms and extends her hands, regardless of the need. And there is no doubt that she is busy. But she’s not ever too busy to reach out to those who are less fortunate. Or to those who are struggling. I imagine that this woman’s home was full of people who just wanted to be sitting on her couch just to be near her and her family. Her hospitality wasn’t lacking, I’m sure. The compassion that came from this woman was probably abundant.

She would just extend her hands to those who needed it. And from the depths of despair of those she saw around her she was able to share, Christ, grace, love, mercy, and friendship. And THAT, my friends is what it’s all about.

Inspiring, isn’t it?

diligence

2 Jan

I’m back today talking about the next two verses in my study on Proverbs 31.  I didn’t mean to skip last week but it happened because of two little words: THE HOLIDAYS.

Need I say more?

My thoughts on the next two verses are pretty short and sweet. In comparison to my other posts in this series. The next two verses are:

“She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.” Proverbs 31:18-19

I’ve really taken this past week to think on, pray over and really meditate on these two verses. And what I think it comes down to is DILIGENCE.  She is diligent.

The first part of the verse says that she sees that her trading is profitable.  I personally think that this means that she really sees that ALL she does is profitable. And profitable according to the dictionary means: beneficial or useful. So it doesn’t JUST mean financially profitable. She makes sure that all she does is beneficial. Beneficial to her husband, her family, her friends, her work, her ministry. ALL she does is beneficial and with a purpose.

Her lamp does not go out at night.

She COMPLETES what she’s started. And she does it well. She chooses to do the things that are only of benefit. She is not a ‘yes’ woman. She knows her limit and how full to fill her plate. And of those things that she fills her life with, she completes the tasks at hand. She is literally up late working. And being diligent with what she’s committed to.

In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

Not only do I think that she was DEFINITELY up late sewing her kiddos clothes from the previous days play, but I also think this verse goes hand in hand with what I just talked about.

DILIGENCE.

She is diligent in the details, holding the distaff and grasping the spindle. Diligence means constant and earnest effort to accomplish what was undertaken. To be diligent in your work, your life, your family requires constant effort. But to truly have the freedom to be diligent in your life, it means we have to chose what we do WISELY. We can’t do or accomplish it all. We need to make sure that what we are setting out to do will truly be beneficial to our families and our lives. And then work at those things with commitment and diligence. Starting what we can accomplish and then accomplishing what we start.

There’s not one thing about this Proverbs 31 woman that doesn’t amaze me. And still in today’s time, we can learn so much from her and God’s design for us as women.

Be encouraged today. Start this new year out not by taking on too many things that you can’t complete them all. But by deciding what is beneficial and working at those things with commitment and DILIGENCE.

Easier said than done, but so worth it.

vineyards

19 Dec

This is a long one, but worth it I think. If you’re needing some encouragement, please read on!

I took a tiny break from my study in Proverbs 31 and not on purpose at all. I seriously got caught up on my work and realized that I hadn’t blogged in days. Totally not like me. I heart blogging and hate when theres gaps of time when I can’t get to it. But sometimes, you have to just let go of the things that you can’t get to. There were certain days that I literally couldn’t do one more thing. Even blogging. So I took a breath and just let it go. But now I’m starting to feel caught back up and I’m diving in again.

Oddly enough, this weeks verses that I’m studying are about WORK. They are:

‘She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.’ Proverbs 31:16-17

This woman WORKS. And she works HARD. I mean, aren’t you kind of tired FOR her already? I think it’s interesting that these two verses are in here. And it makes me wonder what we can take away from it and how we can apply it to our own lives and families.

First, she considers a field and buys it. Whether this woman is wanting to buy a field to plant a garden to help feed her family or to actually plant a vineyard to profit from it FOR her family, the keys here that jump off the page at me are that she considers it. And she buys it.

DUH Jess. The Bible clearly says that.

Well, I think it’s important and not something that we should just breeze past. And because I actually have A LOT to say on these two verses, I’ll cut to the chase on this first half. She’s considering the field BEFORE she buys it because that’s what’s wise to do. She’s probably praying about it, thinking about it, and getting counsel on it. CONSIDERING it. Weighing all the options. She’s not just jumping in head first without knowing what she’s getting into. She’s considering ALL of the options and what these decisions will mean for her family, seeing as that this is most likely some sort of business opportunity for her. It’s so important to wait on things and on decisions. And to honestly pray about them. And not just go on a feeling we have inside ourselves. CONSIDER it. All of it.

Next it says she BUYS it. It doesn’t say she borrows the money to buy it. She doesn’t finance it from the bank. She doesn’t ‘rob Peter to pay Paul’. She just buys it. It means she’s saved up enough money for it and she pays for it in cash. Now, I’m not passing any judgement on anyone who might be in a world of debt. Or using credit cards. Or borrowing money to make ends meet. We have quite a bit of debt ourselves that we are STILL trying to get rid of. I SO get it. We’ve made some really crappy mistakes financially in the past. But Jason and I together have clearly learned the lesson. We’ve learned what the Bible says about debt and about borrowing money. And it’s something we’re working hard to put behind us. And the good news is that we’re getting there. And it’s because of verses like this one, which don’t tiptoe around the issue of debt. She BUYS it. It’s hers, completely paid in full. Zero debt. No financial burden of debt. It’s pretty clear, if you ask me.

It THEN says ‘out of her EARNINGS she plants a vineyard’. Again, she’s not borrowing money. She’s working hard and earning it to be able to afford to do something she’s always wanted or loved or maybe NEEDS to do. Regardless of what she’s trying to do with her money, she’s EARNING it. She’s saving her pennies, being a good steward with what she’s being given, praying and considering her options and then spending her money wisely.

Then she plants a vineyard.

This might seem like a really insignificant detail. But I TOTALLY disagree. Have you ever planted a vineyard? Or known anyone who’s planted a vineyard? ME NEITHER. So I don’t know a lot about vineyard planting and about growing grapes and about turning it into wine. I’m not even going to pretend that I do. BUT, what I DO know is that planting and caring for a vineyard is a LOT of work. Or what I can imagine to be a lot of work. A lot of laboring work that’s exhausting, time consuming and not rewarding in the beginning at all. It takes a lot of time, a lot of patience, and a lot of WORK.

Don’t you just want to hug this woman?

There’s seriously something to be learned here. She is a super hard worker. She’s not looking for the ‘get rich quick’ gimmicks. She’s not frustrated that the fruit of her labor isn’t exploding immediately. She is being faithful with where she’s at right now, diving into her work every day with very little reward. I DO know that growing a vineyard can take YEARS. Years of waiting and working and being faithful before you see any fruit of your labor. And I’m amazed at this woman even more. She is faithful in her work, every single day. It’s not always easy. It’s not hardly rewarding. But she KNOWS that that’s not what this life is about. And she works hard anyways doing what she’s called to do. Faithful that her work will pay off and that God will bless her greatly.

Next it says that she sets about her work vigorously and that her arms are strong for her tasks. I looked up the word vigorously in the dictionary and it means strong, active, forceful and even robust. This woman is not lazy by any stretch of the imagination. She is energetic in her tasks. Can you honestly say that YOU are working energetically in the work YOU’VE been called to do right now? Or are you doing just enough to skate by because frankly, you’re exhausted? I know that it’s hard. Trust me. There are plenty of days that I just want to lie down, have a good cry and not face half of the things I need to do that day. And I honestly love my work! I KNOW how overwhelming it is to be a mom and to consider all that you’re doing as your WORK. It’s a huge load to bear. And we’re all doing it every day!

But what if we changed our mindset just a smidge? What if we looked at our WORK as our vineyards. Something that needs to be slowly nurtured and cared for EVERY day. Something that needs a lot of time put into it and that doesn’t come with a basket full of rewards right away. We should be working faithfully every day, regardless the reward or lack thereof. I know even in the area of motherhood, the rewards are far and few between. But shouldn’t I be treating THAT alone as a vineyard?? Carefully and intentionally and FAITHFULLY pouring my time and energy into them is definitely something that won’t be abounding in rewards right away. But what you sow you will reap. And the rewards in the area of mothering will come, if not for a long time. When the days are long and hard, I’m going to start thinking about my work as my vineyard.

The end of the passage says that her arms are strong for her tasks. And they are strong because she works hard. She physically works all day long, and she has for years. Her body CAN withstand all that the day holds. It doesn’t say she’s weary. Her arms are ready to pick up children all day long. They are ready to lug groceries into the house from the car. And to carry loads and loads and loads of laundry upstairs. She’s strong. And ready to take on the day. And prepared to handle whatever might be thrown at her. Whatever her tasks may be. And they all look different for all of us. That’s the beauty of it.

I know this post has been kind of long. But I hope it’s encouraged you. Your life today might seem tough. It might seem like you’re working SO HARD and there’s no end in sight. Or like you’re not getting anywhere and there’s nothing great about what you’re doing. And I would strongly disagree. I encourage you to view your tasks and your work as your vineyard. Work that will NOT go in vain and that will one day we blooming with rewards that have been cultivated by YOU for a long time. The fruits of your labor will not go unnoticed by our God who’s entrusted you with so much. Whether that be with your children or your day job or both. He sees us in the trenches every single day. Stay faithful to what he’s given you. Press on and know that someday all the work you’re doing now will be SO worth it. You ARE strong. You ARE capable. And you can do this. I know you feel tired and weary because I feel it too. All the time. But refocusing your mind on what your work really means in the kingdom of God will make all the difference in your life.

Think of all of it as your vineyards. And vineyards certainly don’t appear overnight. But rather, they take years of faithful, vigorous, work. But it’s SO worth it in the end.

full confidence

7 Nov

I started a new series that I’ll be aiming to post on Mondays until it’s completed. I’m pretty excited about it and hope you’ll be just as encouraged in it as I am!  I’ve really been trying to focus on Proverbs 31 about The Wife of Noble Character. Each week I’m trying to take a verse or two from it and dissect it and just really think on what is being said through it. I really want to lean into the wisdom that is inside these verses. There is so much- SO MUCH for me/us to learn from this woman. And there’s so much I neglect, but that I aspire to be when I read these verses. It’s inspiring, convicting and encouraging all at once.

I hope that this series encourages you too.

Last week, I only talked about verse 10 and what a wife of noble character means and is. Well, I scratched the surface of it, really, as I’m sure we could have enormous discussions on what it means to be a wife of noble character. If you’d like to read that post, you can check it out HERE. I’ve thought a lot about that this week, and it really has encouraged me. I’ve thought a lot about my character this week and what I do AND don’t like about it. And what I need to work on. It’s sort of humbling to think about your character, isn’t it? When I thought about whether or not my character was NOBLE or not, I was definitely convicted. But I was also encouraged because it showed me so much of what I desire to be.

This week I’m going to talk about verse eleven and twelve. They go hand in hand, I think. AND it’s really interesting that these verses follow a verse that talks about a woman/wife’s character. The verses are:

“Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” Proverbs 31:11-12

I think these two verses go hand in hand here. As a wife of noble character, her husband can do nothing BUT have full confidence in her. Her character is excellent, exalted, magnificent. Wouldn’t YOU have full confidence in someone like that? Of course you would! Someone who has such excellent character can be nothing but trusted. Of course her husband has full confidence in her. Her character is incredible. It’s NOBLE. It then goes on to say that he isn’t missing anything that is of value when it comes to her. He fully trusts her. Although I know what the word ‘confidence’ means, I still wanted to check out its’ full definition, and this is the very first definition there is:

– full trust; belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing. Having every confidence in their ability to succeed.

This woman’s husband TRUSTS her. He BELIEVES in her. And he knows with full confidence that she will be successful at whatever it is that she does.

I think that the next verse, verse twelve, speaks to her very character right off the bat. It says that she brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. Breaking this verse down, first I see that she BRINGS him good. It doesn’t say that she waits until he deserves it, presents it whenever she feels like it, or that she only gives it to him sometimes. It says she brings him GOOD not harm, ALL the days of her life. No exceptions. I think it’s so easy to forget this as wives. Isn’t it? It’s always really easy to think about what our husbands aren’t doing and to bring a critical spirit. It’s easier to focus on the negative, and to see the things that don’t get done.

I’m guilty of this sometimes.

When I think about what it means to bring good, NOT harm to our husbands, I think this can mean many, many things. It can mean just bringing a joyful spirit to your home. It can mean lifting him up when you’re around your peers, instead of talking negatively about him in front of other people. It can mean being his biggest supporter, no matter what life may bring, until the day you die. It can mean just being content in your life. Or just proud of him for working so hard. Or just because he’s an amazing dad. It can mean bringing words of affirmation into your home and lifting him up, even when you don’t feel like it.

It’ll look a little different for all of us in our lives. But what I’m reading doesn’t say WHAT good we are supposed to bring. But we are just supposed to bring it.

And we are called not to harm him. It doesn’t say that you can bring him harm a little bit if he really deserves it, or that you can just bring him down verbally behind his back a little bit because he really made you mad. It says that  no harm should be brought to him. He is protected by his wife, in many ways, ALL the days of her life. ALL of them.

And I think he has full confidence in her because of this. He KNOWS she’s got his back, come what may in this life time. And she also flourishes because he trusts her so much. What a beautiful, beautiful verse. One I never really took the time to ponder. I think a wife like this really starts from within. It starts with your character. Excellent character that does nothing but bleed out joy, happiness, trust and goodness. A character that moves you to go out of your way to bring your husband good to his life, ALL the days of yours. One where harming him isn’t even an option. She trusts him too. And it’s a really amazing cycle that I see here in these two verses.

I love being a wife. I really do. But it’s so easy to go about all the to-dos of the day and to forget to view your relationship as a ministry. As a mission field. It’s easy to forget that we are called too, to serve our husbands and to bring good to their lives. To let is spring from the depths of your character so it is a true reflection of your heart. Even three verses in, I’m seeing how important our characters as women really is. How matters of the heart really do matter. For what your character really is, is what will flow out. And what flows out spills onto others.

Onto our husbands. And our children even.

Our character is a direct reflection of where our heart really is. Who we REALLY are. And how we treat people. Most importantly, our husbands.

Phew. It’s heavy stuff to my heart. But so, so good.