dear rider,

I am a total jerk.

I never posted, nor did I even acknowledge, your birthday on this blog little man. You are not loved any less because of this, let me assure you. And while being too busy should never be an excuse when it comes to the people you love, I AM going to go ahead and say, WE HAVE BEEN SO BUSY. Busy with YOU, your brother, work, being sick, LIFE. Life has gotten away from me these past couple months and we are just trying to stay on top of it all!

Regardless, I didn’t mean to not write to you on your birthday. Or post pictures of your awesome birthday party. Everyone had so much fun celebrating you.

You are such a little character. At one year old, you already have more strength than you know what to do with. You are fast. You are strong. And you are quiet, all at the same time. A quiet strength which I can only hope and pray that will carry you through your life. You are happy and so easy to make smile. Our little positive go-getter. I don’t really think you understand what being cautious is.

So different from me.

It’s amazing to watch you learn and grow and explore new things. My new favorite thing these days is watching you walk. It’s so darn cute. You have so much that you want to check out and get into. There’s so much to explore.  Chasing you around IS quite a bit of work. But I wouldn’t change it or you for anything.

The truth is, you add so many special things to this family. And a year ago I had no idea the joy I would feel by the time you were one. Celebrating your first birthday with all of our close friends and family was exactly what it should have been. And we can’t wait to share many more birthdays with you.

You are a special, special boy to us, Rider-man. And we love you more than you will ever know.

Happy First Birthday, (a month late on this blog),

Mommy

party hats

I had to post this picture. I took this on his birthday right before he went to bed (and apparently right before I wiped his nose!) and I just thought it was too funny. My friend Katelyn made these cute little hats for her son Hudson’s birthday party, and she gave me one for Cruz.

Jason and I just had so much fun celebrating his birthday with him all day; all the way up until he went to bed! And I promise I wiped his nose right after I took this picture. Wow, that’s one snotty nose! Ha!

birthday boy

I can’t believe my baby boy is one today. It seriously feels like just yesterday I was meeting his little face for the first time! The past year has flown by and it’s amazing how much can truly change in that amount of time. We feel incredibly blessed with all that’s come our way and we’ve grown a lot in this journey. Being a parent is harder than you’d think- at least for me it’s hard! But Cruz has been the biggest blessing of our lives and I know we both couldn’t have asked for more.

I was just telling my Grandma the other night that when I got pregnant I was so excited to have a baby- little did I know I was about to have the coolest little kid ever who would make my heart explode every single day. It’s amazing what motherhood does to you- even in all it’s hard moments, I still wouldn’t trade anything I’ve learned.

We had Cruz’s first birthday this past Saturday and it was such a blast! We were surrounded by great friends and family for a couple hours and Cruz really had a blast.

He had no idea the party was for him, but whatever.

Casey and Katelyn Block were so awesome to open up their home for us to have his party there. Their home is so beautiful and they are two of the most wonderful people that Jay and I know. They are like family, really. Katelyn and our other dear friend Amy made all of these adorable cupcakes for Cruz’s big day! I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw all the little animals made of fondant- Katelyn really went above and beyond for us and it was such a blessing. It warmed my heart more than I think she even knows.

We had a lot of friends help out with food and everyone just came for lunch and hanging out. It was a cool day on Saturday and it was rainy! It was refreshing that it wasn’t so warm (in November) and that we could all hang out outside- despite the light drizzle! Cruz LOVED the bubble machine that was at the Block’s house. The kids all played with the bubbles and all of Cruz’s little friends were there.

Then we set up the high chair outside and presented Cruz with his little ‘smash cake’ (that Katelyn made), and we sang Happy Birthday to him. I was sort of hoping that he’d dive in and make a big huge mess.

That didn’t happen.

My kid is picky with what he puts in his mouth and the only things he really likes to eat is cheese and fruit. Maybe we should have made a cake made of just cheese? Weird.

So he just looked at the cake and he really wanted to play with the candle! So he touched it a little bit, got frosting on his face and that was about it. Ha! Then we all enjoyed the amazing cupcakes and Cruz opened presents! Well, I opened them for him, but he sat and ‘helped’. He got all kinds of goodies and he loves playing with his new toys. We were so grateful to everyone who took two hours out of their day to come celebrate with our special little man. He’s so loved and we have some of the greatest friends and family ever, who love us so much. We don’t take any of them forgranted.

So the party wasn’t long, but it was the perfect amount of time to get some great pictures and eat some great food! I keep saying it- but I can’t believe that a year has gone by. This time last year, my life was in a very different place. I had very different visions for our lives and I thought our future would be in a very different place. I had no idea that I’d be a stay at home mom, with a successful business, in-between churches and possibly moving. But I wouldn’t change anything about where we’ve come from, where we are at and where we are going. Although it’s been the most emotional couple months I’ve had in a long time, it’s clear that God is in control of our lives. It’s clear that He’s directing our steps. And it’s awesome to finally be able to relax in that.

A year ago today I saw my little man’s face for the first time. And I never thought that he’d be who he is. Everything about him has been everything and more than I could have ever imagined or hoped for. He just lights up every room he enters. He brings joy to so many, everywhere we go. And while he has a ton of energy and I’m tired all the time, I wouldn’t trade that kid for anything. I’m excited for all the birthdays that Jason and I will spend with him.

May there be many, many more!

Happy Birthday my little Cruzer man! You deserve all the best things in this life!

early presents

I can’t believe we are less than a week away from Cruz’s first birthday. That is just crazy and time truly does fly by! It’s amazing how much can change in a year.

More on that later…

My Grandma Imo, Cruz’s Great Gram, gave him his birthday present a little early. And he’s pretty happy that she did! She got him the Fisher Price Smart Bounce & Spin Pony, and boy does he love it!! It comes with a wireless device that allows Cruz to control the on-screen activities with images that respond to his movements. There’s fun animation, music, sounds, characters, and a lot of exciting things he can explore and learn. Such a brilliant gift for my little man, who loves exploring everything and who gets into anything!

Now the only trick is teaching him how to get off the pony without falling off! We haven’t mastered that one yet.

Thank you Great Gram! Cruz loves his new toy and mommy is thrilled that it’s a toy that he can use for months and months! Cruz loves you so much!

birthday plans

I had a big ‘ol sha-bang planned for Cruz’s birthday, which is a little over a month away. Now, due to our current circumstances, we’ve had to scale back a little bit. And that’s fine- actually, it’s helped me remember what IS important here. And he’s not going to remember anything about this day, except for what he sees in the pictures that we’ll keep forever. What’s important to me is that all of our friends and family come and that this little guy looks back on his first birthday and knows how loved he is.

We have some of the greatest friends and family- I mean, people who have just surrounded us during this time in our lives. It’s been so comforting and we really are starting to feel excited for the future!

I can’t believe that this time last year I was still pregnant with Cruz. It is crazy how fast time goes, and it’s the most cliche thing to say, and something that every mom I’ve ever met says. But it is so true. My little boy is almost 1. I was looking at good shoes for him today because he’s going to start walking soon and I want to make sure he has some good looks for his little footers!

But that is crazy. When he wasn’t even born yet, I had no idea how fast this year was going to go. And truly, how much our lives were going to change.

Everything has changed. Everything is different. We never thought we’d be here.

But I am excited to venture onto the 2nd year of Cruz’s life. And as we plan for his big party, it’s a lot easier for me to keep focused on what truly is important. We don’t need to spend a lot of money to make his party huge and fantastic. All our friends and family will be there, celebrating our little boy who’s changed our lives so- and who we are so thankful for and blessed by. Every birthday we pass will be a celebration of life.

The life of a special kid who brings out the best in us.